25 internet marketing facts

A bunch of random facts about internet marketing, all of which are worth knowing, regardless of their randomness: Internet marketing is hard. Really hard. It's not something that easily succumbs to a 'miracle system'. Guys like Shoemoney have it right - they have systems, but they don't say it's easy. Internet marketing can't be done by a computer. You're still marketing to human beings. That's why #2 is true. As long as we're selling to humans, we're going to need humans to handle the marketing. 'Internet' marketing is more of a medium than a method. Marketing is a method/technique. Internet…

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Sell the way your customers want to buy

Linda Lybert knows sales. I mean she really knows sales, the way a history professor knows history. She wrote a brilliant, brief white paper about sales, titled "Are you going to sell to me the way you want to sell or the way I want to buy?", and she was kind enough to give me a copy to distribute, for free, from my blog. What I like most about her writing and philosophy is that she takes something that should be obvious, but isn't, raps you gently on the forehead and says "LISTEN UP". In this white paper, she goes…

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See me speak. I never shut up.

In the next 2 months, I'm speaking all over the place: SMX West, Pubcon South, SEMPDX Searchfest, IMC Calgary and the Gig Harbor Web Design Meetup. It's presentation pandemonium. Here's the list of dates and places, and what I think I'll be presenting. SMX West: March 2-4, 2010, Santa Clara. Good God, that's next week! I'm a panelist in Analytics Action Plans For PPC & SEO, Day 3. Christine Churchill is moderating. I'll be lurking about the other 2 days, of course, then zipping home after I present so I can watch the kids while my wife goes galavanting to…

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Social Media Seminar Rebroadcast

Last week I gave a 1-hour presentation about social media to Lenora Edwards' roundtable group. This is a recording (warts and all) in two parts. I cover a lot of territory, from 'what is social media' to a couple of templates for using social media to grow your business. Have a look: Part 1: Part 1 of a 45-minute presentation I gave about social media in February of 2010. This part introduces the concepts of online social media, the implications for business, and how you can build a network.Part 2 covers the second half of the presentation and provides some…

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Introducing The Fat Free Guide: What I'd do on Groundhog Day

I'm talking about the movie Groundhog Day, not the day when we try to predict the weather using a large rodent (I know it's not really a rodent, but come on). Quick synopsis: Bill Murray lives through the same day again and again as the universe tries to show him the direction to take his life. Hilarity ensues. Bill gets clever, though, learning to play piano, preventing accidents that he's seen happen over and over again, etc.. I like it! If I got to live through 2/2 again and again, I'd: Memorize stock prices and become the ultimate day trader.…

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Internet Marketing and the Second 50

I used to do these ultra-marathon cycling events. 'Used to' means '16 years ago', by the way. You'd get up in the morning, ride 200-500 miles in a single day, and then go pass out. Insanity. But I learned something really important: No matter how long the ride, the second 50 miles is the worst. In the first 50 miles, you're charged up. You've been carbo-loading for a month, have your bike totally in tune, and it's 5 AM, so there's no wind. Then you hit the second 50 miles. The sun comes up, and with it, a nasty headwind…

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Zombies, social media and the buying cycle

I think it's time we all moved on. I'm going to stop bitching about the phrase 'social media'. In exchange, you're all going to stop pondering whether you need a social media strategy. The term social media is here to stay, clearly. And it is critical as new potential customers come looking for what you offer. I'm going to prove it. With zombies. Point 1: Your logo is not your brand Most folks state that their brand is a fixed thing: It's their logo, and maybe a style guide with some color choices in it. They're wrong. While a great…

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A blast from the past

Just a random, too-early-in-the-morning post to point out that I still have this internet marketing book you can read, online, for free (as in beer): Conversation Marketing: An internet marketing strategy that works You can buy a copy, too, of course. But for some reason folks prefer the free version. Go figure...…

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11 internet marketing trends to ignore in 2010

Flush with my 2009 success, I'm heading straight into my predictions for 2010. These are the trends I think the pundits will yell about even as they slip gracefully beneath the waves, never to be seen again: Bing versus Google. Bing came out swinging, took one on the chin and went down like a sack of wet cement. All they've managed to do is take market share from their latest acquisition, Yahoo!. Microsoft, take note: It's not about $80 million in marketing dollars that you lit on fire. It's. About. The. Algorithm. And yours still sucks. Yahoo!. Along the same…

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2009 trends to ignore: How I did

Every year, I write a list of trends to utterly ignore, dismiss and otherwise mock relentlessly. You can read my 11 2009 trends to ignore here. So, how'd I do? Not too bad, actually: Analytics. I said that a lack of standards would make analytics a contentious issue in 2009. Utter fail. I couldn't have been more wrong. Everyone keeps slavering after 'results-driven marketing' like zombies in a Living Dead movie, and to hell with standardization problems. Vertical search. I said it'd continue to suck. It did. The sheer lack of interest and attention tells you this horse is dead,…

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HTML Basics: Headings and Paragraphs (video tutorial)

This is the next video in my HTML basics series. If you're a blogger, you must learn to use headings and paragraphs. Watch this video and you'll no longer have to format your posts by making something large bold italic blue underline type. You can just put a little 'H2' around it. Learn how to add headings and paragraphs using the H and P tags in HTML. The first was a Web Page 101: Creating your first page. Related Posts HTML basics: Creating your first web page A copywriter's guide to semantic markup A copywriter's practical guide to smart internal…

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Internet marketing is an ecosystem: Join it.

Crows amaze me. They've turned survival into an art form. How? They don't fight the ecosystem - they join it. Watch Joshua Klein's TED talk on the subject if you want proof. Make sure you watch from minute 5:25-6:08. Crows learned to wait by the curb to cross the street and collect a nut. Seriously. Crows could run into the street and hope the cars will stop. The result? Squish. Internet marketing offers us a similar choice: Dash out among the customers (cars) and hope they'll stop. This is old-style, interruption-based marketing. I think we know how well that works.…

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The 18 most abused phrases of 2009

Shoutout to LyndiT for pushing me to write this via Twitter. The year's not even over but we've already beaten the crap out of so many phrases I figured I'd better get started. So, in no particular order, here they are: Engagement. Marketing isn't combat, or marriage. Stop trying to tell me I need to propose to every single potential customer who comes to my site. Twitterverse. Just. Don't. Say. It. Tweeple. You KNOW you've got a winning media platform when you can generate two hated terms in the same year. New media. Are you FREAKING KIDDING ME? This term…

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7 Tips for StumbleUpon Success

If you want to learn about StumbleUpon and what it is, read my previous article about Stumbleupon traffic quality.. StumbleUpon is my friend. In a weird, they-just-showed-up-and-were-nice-to-me kind of way. I'll write an article about, say, The Plague that is Powerpoint. Nothing happens. I shrug and move on to the next piece. Then BAM, weeks later traffic goes ballistic: Pretty dang cool. I have no idea who started that Stumblefest, but thanks! No manipulation First: I am not manipulating StumbleUpon. I don't have 50 accounts so that I can stumble my own stuff. In fact, I no longer stumble my…

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Want to be a great internet marketer? Be like CSI.

I'm sitting here watching CSI (ironic, since I'm going to Las Vegas tomorrow for Pubcon). What makes this show so damned compelling? The sneak peek plus a dose of authenticity. The sneak peek builds the connection You have a job, a career, or a business. You love it, but you do the same stuff every day. It seems routine - why would anyone want to know about it? Because they don't do your same stuff every day. They do their same stuff every day. The writers of CSI treat us like they want us to understand. We appreciate that. A…

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Sound Transit Web Site Review: They get an F-

Sound Transit is soliciting comments and ideas to improve their web site. I've long seen this site as a blight upon all public transit, so I did a special edition video review. Note that I am having a crappy week, and it's only Monday, so any harshness is totally 100% authentic: For God's sake, guys, at least put a map on your home page.…

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Internet Marketing is like HiDef TV

This weekend, my wife and I bought a flat-screen, LCD TV set. Hard to believe, but Ian Lurie, ubergeek, has never owned a TV larger than 36", and hasn't bought a TV since 2002. We got it home, did all the hookup stuff. Turned on the TV. And our jaws dropped. It is impossible to describe what hi-definition TV looks like. I've had people tell me. I've even seen it in stores. But until it's sitting in your house, and you can pick out every hair on House's stubbly face, you don't understand. Someone gave me all the data about…

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Action + perception = identity: Branding in Social Media

I'm on a panel in about 2 hours at REBlogworld. The panel I'm on will discuss the relationship between branding and social media. So I've been thinking a lot about the intersection of brands and social media. Here's the thing: Your brand is not your logo. Your brand has always been: Action. The actions you take: How you treat customers. What products you make or carry. What you did that one time something went wrong. Perception. How your audience perceives those actions. Action is still the same Social media hasn't changed the influence your actions can have on your brand.…

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Dork detection: 10 questions for 'professional' developers

I don't have anything against developers. What drives me up a wall are people who think they're developers because they can drag and drop controls in Visual Studio or Dreamweaver. If you're not a geek yourself, though, it's hard to figure out who's full of knowledge and who's full of crap. So here you go - my 10-question evaluation: How do you write your code? If the answer is "I don't write it. Visual Studio/Dreamweaver/whatever writes it for me", give them a copy of Textmate or similar and ask them to come back in 5 years. How do you…

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Get a $500 Website Review, Free

Update: Submissions are now closed. I'll be announcing the winners on October 21st (or 22nd). Thanks everyone who submitted. I am, by the way, still accepting bribes. Something's wrong with your web site. Let me restate that: Something's wrong with your web site. There's always room to improve your search rankings, copy, design, usability or marketing campaign. You can get advice from your cousin's brother's sister's friend who once worked at a company where she got to build the corporate site using Microsoft Word. Or, you can talk to an expert. But experts cost money, and you don't have a…

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Call to action matters: Site Review #4

This week we review HealthyHalo.com. I focus in particular on the call to action, with a light sprinkling of SEO at the end: Call to action: CM Site review #4 from ian lurie on Vimeo.…

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10 Surefire Ways To Burn Money

Hire one contractor to design your site, then send the development work to an offshore company. Guaranteed to produce a Frankenstein monster every time. Make your IT/development team build the entire site, with little or no input from the sales, marketing or fulfillment teams. You'll spend at least twice the initial development cost on post-launch changes, I promise. Run your own pay per click campaign after reading one e-book by someone who says they Beat Google. The money won't burn, in this case, so much as it will vanish with a 'pop'. Tolerate mediocrity because it's cheap. If you…

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Here's the thing about marketing...

...it's only as good as the product you're selling, and your knowledge of the product. See, I can write some great copy, and we can pull together a gorgeous web site, and then we can add all sorts of whiz-bang Web 300.0 stuff to it. We can make the cart really usable, too. And you'll sell a few things here and there. But if the product sucks, word will get around, fast. The only things that spread faster on the internet than bad reviews are celebrity sex tapes and leaks about Apple's next product. And, if you can't tell me…

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Should I choose marketing or SEO?

Yes.…

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Title tags, text and images, Oh My! This week's video site review

Evan Fishkin joined me today to review SilverArcSearchMarketing.com. Our big pointers: Cleaner title tags, better image compression and some work on internal site linking. Title tags and graphics and text, Oh My! Review of Silver Arch Search Marketing from ian lurie on Vimeo.…

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eBoot Camp Book Review: It Ain't Pretty

In spite of my occasional tirade, I'm actually a fairly nice guy. If I read a book I don't like, I just don't write about it. However, if I read a book that misinforms, is poorly researched and may harm the readers' businesses, I get angry. Unfortunately, eBoot Camp falls into the latter category. And I'm... disappointed. The Good eBoot Camp (By Corey Perlman, published by Wiley and Sons, 2009) is a good, super-high-level look at launching a web site. Perlman touches on things like usability, opt-in e-mail marketing and PPC. That's good. The Bad But he barely touches on…

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22 Things You Don't Know About Your Customers

There are things you don't know about your customers. It's not you, it's them. But you need to figure it out. Here are some hard lessons I've learned over the years - they apply to usability, pet peeves and other fun stuff. Learn these and you'll have more, happier customers/visitors/readers/fans: 1. Reading onscreen is hard, for everyone The most basic principle of usability: It's hard for folks to read online. Much harder than reading in print. Remember this. Burn it into your brain. Small typefaces, weird page layouts and odd color schemes may seem great, but they're bound to hurt…

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Sites Where I Learn Stuff

I have a few sites I go to day-in and day-out. They're well-written, informative as heck, and a great source of inspiration. Here they are: Smashing Magazine. No surprise. The folks at Smashing Magazine publish one great, inspirational post after another. If you're a designer, developer or web marketer you want to subscribe and check them out daily. Nettuts+. I recently discovered Nettuts+ and am addicted. The tutorials are detailed and cover everything from PHP frameworks to Flash. Noupe is another great tutorial site. I could probably spend all day just reading some of these... Information Aesthetics. A collection of…

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Headline Writing 101: Taught by TechCrunch

I've written about headlines before: A good headline can vitalize your entire page. A bad headline puts your page in a coma. Then there are the headlines that chop your page into small, bloody, fist-sized chunks and throw them into the ocean for hungry sharks to peck at. And that, everyone, is what we're going to talk about today. TechCrunch published an anonymous post today. I'm not going to link to it, because it doesn't deserve the juice. Nor am I going to pick apart the many problems in it - lots of other folks will do that. Instead, I'm…

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Hopeton Hay Radio Interview

Elizabeth Marsten and I were interviewed by Hopeton Hay for his radio show, Economic Perspectives. You can download it and listen to it here: [ economic perspectives interview 6.29.09 ] The main topic: The book, Web Marketing All-in-One Desk Reference for Dummies. Two important notes: Elizabeth and I wrote five of the sections of the book. The rest of the book was written by John Arnold (also the editor), Marty Dickinson and Michael Becker. I wasn't actually talking through a huge wad of cotton. I just have to say that. Not sure what the hell was going on with my…

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Internet Marketing Puppy Syndrome

Some friends of ours got a puppy. Her name's Gracie. She is adorable. Excruciatingly cute and soulful in a head tilting kind of way. Gracie is awesome. But she's a lot of work. Think about that when you decide to launch that blog, or create a newsletter, or set up a Twitter account. You know me - I rarely discourage folks from trying stuff. If you don't test and try, you can't make any progress. But you have to really try. You have to go into a project with your eyes open and a genuine desire to succeed. Approach it…

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Bing's PPC Meltdown

I don't try to find ways to pick on Microsoft's marketing techniques. It's just that they make it so easy. The folks at Bing have decided to buy pay per click ads on Google Adwords. Not a bad idea. But they need to learn a bit about phrase and exact match, I think: And my favorite: OK, I'll stop. I'm supposed to be on vacation, after all... Related Posts Bing Goes Bonk: Marketing lessons from the search wars Aggregation Aggravation, Part 1…

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Get Free Marketing Advice (With a Catch)

I'm launching a new service called 1Thing. The idea: Provide internet marketing advice, in small bites, at a low price. I've designed a landing page, created the templates, etc.. And I hate it. The landing page is nasty. Horrible. It makes me cry. I've gotten fantastic advice from other marketers. And I've used quite a bit of it. Problem is, they gave me advice from the perspective of super-experienced internet marketers. I need advice from potential consumers. That's where you come in. If you read this blog looking for little nuggets of advice you can use to improve your site,…

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32 Tips To Make Online Customers Love You

I've been on a bit of a negative tear lately. OK, OK. I've been on a negative tear since I was born. So today I'm mixing it up a bit, writing about ways to make customers love you, instead of hate you. Make sure your site loads in 3-4 seconds or less on a standard broadband connection. That means that your dual T-3 connection at your office is NOT a good measurement tool. Use the YSlow Firefox plugin to test. Your customers will thank you! Provide clear, easy-to-find contact information. On every page of your site. I've heard folks say…

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The 5 S's: What is internet marketing?

Ask 'What is internet marketing?' and you get a lot of answers. Most center around search engines. And that's not accurate. SEO is part of internet marketing. So is pay per click marketing. So is web design, copywriting, blah blah etc. etc.. I've struggled with one definition of internet marketing for years. I think I've reached a conclusion (until next week): Internet marketing is comprised of the 5 S's The 5 S's are five kinds of optimization that make up internet marketing: Story Optimization Marketing is storytelling. Seth Godin said it best in All Marketers Are Liars. I'm not talking…

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A dose of reality

Time for a bit of reality, folks. Yes, I write a lot about how failure is good, internet marketing is super efficient, costs a fraction of other marketing, etc.. But the NY Times just took that idea to an extreme that leaves me shaking my head. In an article today about whether web entrepreneurs still need venture capital, the interviewee and/or writer said: "Web start-ups are routinely started for less than $50,000." And a few other gems. You can read the article for yourself. My response: "Web start-ups are routinely started for less than $50,000. It's true. And 99% of…

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Bad Chicken and Careless Marketing

I had chicken for dinner last night. The chicken won. Or at least, that seems to be the case. I'm recovering from an 18-hour bout with my own insides, and will leave it at that. Careless marketing is sort of like bad chicken. It crouches, waiting patiently, looking all innocent. Then the next thing you know, bang someone sees a crappy error message like this one and realizes your company is actually a bunch of careless nubwits. Which of course means the hard drive I bought from you may be made by the same nubwits: The message: Everything is marketing.…

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Failure is Guaranteed

Internet marketing works because failure is guaranteed. I did this little slide presentation to explain why (I hope): Failure Is Guaranteed: Internet Marketing's Greatest StrengthView more presentations from Ian Lurie. I try to do only one post that gets me labeled as sarcastic and condescending per week. Otherwise my head gets too big. So this one takes it down a notch. I listened to The Doors while writing it, just to play it safe.…

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11 Internet Marketing Skills That Must Be Second Nature

There are certain skills that you must firmly grasp before you tell folks you're an internet marketer. If you don't, and I hear you tell someone "I'm an internet marketer!", I'm going to stalk you in my Toyota Prius and pin you to a fence. You need to know the following, inside-out, backwards and forwards. They must be second nature. If they ain't, you ain't ready: XHTML and CSS. You don't have to be a god(ess) of web programming. But so help me God the next 'internet marketer' who gives me a blank stare when I mention CSS gets an…

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A Duck and a Donkey Walk into a Bar...

The folks over at Idiom Strategies have done a video about Conversation Marketing. It's dang funny. However, I don't agree with their definition of 'Conversation Marketing'. To me, the 'conversation' means it's two-way between you and every member of your audience. Not that you pursue influencers or leave out 'marketing fluff'. Check out my book for my version. That said, it's a great video, and it's not like I'm the sole authority on the subject:…

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Offline to Online Marketing Webinar Now Available

Slideshare saves the day. After spending 3 days trying to convert this presentation to a slides-with-audio recording, dealing with endless Keynote bugs, I had given up. I uploaded the slides sans audio. But then I noticed Slideshare lets me sync up audio with the slides. Woo hoo! You can listen to the audio-only version here: Webinar in MP3 Format [18 meg] And the slides, with audio, are here: Moving Your Offline Marketing Budget OnlineView more presentations from Ian Lurie. (tags: marketingbudgetsofflineo...) By the way, I have a much-neglected podcast feed that includes about 18-20 other podcasts, presentations and the like.…

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Web Marketing For Dummies Now Available for Pre-Order

For the past eight months, I've been working with four other authors on a new book: Web Marketing All-in-One Desk Reference For Dummies. The book covers everything from setting up a new web site to Google Adwords to SEO and social media. It is truly an all-in-one desk reference for internet marketing. You want this book. You need this book. Most important, I get paid if you buy this book. Why not stop feeling guilty early and just pre-order the damned thing? Web Marketing All-in-One Desk Reference For Dummies…

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Your Internet Marketing Campaign is Screwed When...

You know your internet marketing campaign is screwed when: Your boss refers to the campaign as "a learning experience". You get fewer visitors than you have percentage points in your bounce rate. Your team looks at you blankly when you say "SEO Copywriting". You don't have any analytics tools in place. Just give up. You're proud of the fact that you grabbed the top organic search position for your own brand name. You think quality score is something given to meat. Frank, the developer down the hall who's doing your project in between his other priorities, says "Oh, THAT…

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33 Books An Internet Marketer Must Read

This is my internet marketing reading list: Books I've read over the years that really helped me get going. I've put them in the order I'd read 'em, if I had it all to do again. They start with broad marketing concepts and then focus in, first on internet-specific and then on discipline-specific stuff. You can, of course, read them in any order you like. General Marketing Learning If you don't know marketing, you can't succeed in internet marketing. Learn the basics, first, and you'll go far. Ignore them, and you'll end up the village idiot. Ogilvy on Advertising: You…

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Be An Internet Marketing Jedi

The ideal internet marketer would be a Jedi Knight. Not because she could lop off the heads of hapless competitors (although that would be cool), but because she could move through the complexities of an internet marketing campaign with zen-like effectiveness. She could also fight off the Dark Side, which schemes to destroy all internet marketing campaigns with fear and uncertainty. The Dark Side tries to stop your campaign with a clone army that bleats "We need a detailed marketing plan for the next 2 years" and claims the highest level of training, all while forming a line and…

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Get More Customers (and Links) With Smart Domain Setup

You've got your site all set up at a nice, shiny new domain name. Chances are, though, you're losing visitors. And link authority. Why? Because typos abound, and you're not catching them. Here's how you can grab a lot of traffic that you may be missing right now, and build better link authority, too: Step 1: Reserve Typo Domains First off, reserve domains that may be typos or different interpretations of your domain. If your web address is 'www.yourdomain.com', reserve: www.yourdomains.com www.your-domain.com www.ourdomains.com www.ourdomai.com Obviously, you could end up spending $10,000 on typo domains, so you need to apply a…

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Marketing Sherpa's Having a Sale

Just an FYI: MarketingSherpa is having a 30% off sale on all their books, including the Landing Page Handbook and the E-mail Benchmarks Guide. Have a Look Here Their books are pretty pricey but worth every penny. At 30% off it's definitely worth a look.…

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11 Internet Marketing Trends To Ignore in 2009

After having a bit of success with my 11 Internet Marketing Trends to Ignore in 2008, I thought I'd give it another shot. My only totally incorrect predictions from 2008: E-books are catching on, and podcasts now capture a .002% audience, not .00001%. My bad. Analytics. Yeah, you heard me. I love analytics. But they're gonna flop big-time in 2009 when everyone looks at everyone else and says "Holy crap. There's no standards!" If a pageview on Google Analytics isn't a pageview in Omniture, how the hell can anyone compare anything? Look for 2010 to be the Year of the…

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5 Things You're Forgetting on Your E-commerce Site

So, you're working hard on SEO. You want that higher ranking. Rankings rankings! Nothing else matters! Then, suddenly, your organic traffic is going up, but your sales aren't. You could fire your SEO firm. Clearly your search engine optimization efforts are a flop. I mean, all they did was generate more traffic, right? Or, you could consider other possibilities and address them: 1: Conversions Are Lousy You're getting more traffic but not more sales. That means your site sucks. Sorry, but it's true. Unless your SEO pro is a total moron, they picked the right keywords. Your site's failing to…

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That's it. You're on a time out.

This post might just get me fired. Some client somewhere will read it and be horribly offended that their behavior drives me crazy. To them, I can only say: My kids drive me crazy, too. But I've stayed up all night with them when they're sick, driven them to the emergency room, helped them learn to read, add, multiply and to play Lego Star Wars. They're smart, just like you. They're sophisticated, just like you. And while I might not jump in front of a speeding car for you, I will do everything in my power to help you succeed.…

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10 Years Later, It's Still About The Content

Search engines have dominated the internet scene for at least 10 years now. And there's still only one totally reliable way to gain quality rankings that will truly last: Content. You can build links, send out press releases, spam blog comments and attempt to game the search algorithms to your heart's content. None of it matters if you have a 5-page web site. Sites with lots of quality content continue to dominate the rankings. Sites without crawlable text content continue to struggle. Most important, search engines still base their rankings primarily on the text they find on your site. So…

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25 Random Points about Copywriting

Internet marketing isn't mysterious. It's the writing, stupid. This is a collection of random thoughts about writing, prompted by someone telling me today that "all you know how to do is write". They were attempting to reduce my price for an SEO project. You inspired me! Cheers! Writing is what makes marketing tick. And the folks who think the internet somehow made writing less important in marketing need CAT scans. Great internet marketing starts with copy that's concise. It requires careful thought around linking and structure. And it needs a great headline. Content with a crappy headline is like telling…

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Sears Surprised by Black Friday Traffic. Cough.

So, Sears, you didn't expect a lot of people on your web site today, the biggest single shopping day of the year? A few minutes later, we saw this: Target is up. So is JCPenney, Costco, Walmart, etc.. Too bad for Sears...…

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A Sheet Isn't A Parachute: Lessons in Internet Marketing

Note: The following story is what we call character development. Feel free to skip to 'Lessons in Internet Marketing' if you don't like hearing about people who did even dumber things than you did as a kid. When I was 14 or so, I jumped off the roof of my house. Holding a sheet over my head. As a parachute. This proves conclusively that teenagers should be locked up in small cages until their raging hormones allow more oxygen to their brains. I'd assumed, of course, that the sheet would go FUMP and let me drop gently to the ground,…

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Internet Marketing Is Risky

(This is a 100% election analogy-free post) Internet marketing is not safe. No marketing is. It's risky because: You're marketing to human beings. Human beings aren't all that predictable, unless you throw a $100 bill in front of them, or light their shoes on fire. The world's complicated. Markets implode. Hurricanes happen. Or someone with the same name as your product does something great and sends sales skyrocketing. You're spending money that you can't get back on something that can't be guaranteed. It doesn't matter. You still have to do it. You have to take risks, and risk being wrong,…

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How To: Write an Internet-Ready News Headline

When you write a headline for an online news story, follow three rules: Length isn't (as much of) a constraint. In print, you have to make your headline fit a certain number of column inches. Online, you can add a word or two. Or three. Or even four. Don't keep a headline short and uninformative. Make the headline descriptive. It should stand completely on its own. It's a micro-summary of the story. If written on a blank sheet of paper, it should tell the reader exactly what they're going to learn in the rest of the story. Your headline will…

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10 Ways Internet Marketing Is Like a Ruptured Disc

Just about a year ago, I ruptured two discs in my back and herniated another. Or at least the doctor found them a year ago. Who knows how long I was carrying them around like little ticking tissue time bombs. Gimping yourself that thoroughly makes you think. In fact, you can't do much except think. So you do it a lot. I'm recovering, slowly, but the parallels between this kind of injury and the pain internet marketing appears to inflict on the unwary masses are inescapable: If you ignore it, you'll pee your pants in public Or something equally embarrassing.…

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14 Instant Landing Page Upgrades

Landing pages are a great way to generate sales from pay-per-click ads and e-mail campaigns. Folks click the ad and get a page tailored to their exact needs: You get more conversions, the customers are happy. Unless, of course, your landing page sucks. A few tips to make an instant improvement: Remove unnecessary fields. If you're getting signups for an e-mail newsletter, why do you need their mailing address? Or their phone number? Remove those fields and your conversion rate goes up, I promise. Make a clearer button. For whatever reason, the Big Red Button works better than the little…

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5 Tips To Make Sure You're Speaking to the Right Audience: Congress Bails on the Bailout

President Bush could have seen his bailout package passed two weeks ago, by a clear majority. But he spoke to the wrong audience. His audience was not Congress. His audience is American citizenry. If he'd thought about that, he might have said: "This bailout will reduce foreclosures because banks will have more money to lend. You'll get to keep your house." Instead of: "GAAAAAAAAAAH pass this right away OH MY GOD THE SKY IS FALLING HELP HELP?!!!!" Persuade the voters, and they'll persuade Congress in short order. The message the President chose came off as him getting his cronies…

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Book Review: 2008 Landing Page Handbook

Disclaimer: I'm a Marketing Sherpa Affiliate. I was not paid for this review. But if you buy the book from this link I will get a bit of cash. Pretty please? I re-read this book every year, and make most of my staff read it (or at least try to) as well. There are plenty of books out there that talk in broad generalities about internet marketing. They say great stuff like 'Write great content' and 'Offer value to your visitors'. Duh. The Bad First, this book is HUGE. I would've ruptured a disc lifting it if they weren't already…

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10 Rules for Setting Your Internet Marketing Budget

It Costs WHAT?!!!!! I'm tired of hearing that. Budgeting your internet marketing project may seem like a crap shoot. But I can simplify things for you: If you're building a new site, expect to spend 2X that amount again in the year after the site launches. Unless you want it to sit there, all alone, with no traffic. If you want a site built by a single untrained individual who 'learned how to use Dreamweaver', expect to spend less than $2000. Also, expect to build a new site within 3 months. If you want a site built by a 5-10…

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Use Google to Find Copycats

People will copy your web site. Why? I don't know. Laziness, stupidity, whatever. You can check occasionally by doing a quick search on Google: Copy a sentence from your web site. Something that won't show up on many other sites. Go to Google.com Paste the sentence, with quotes around it, into the search box. Click 'Google Search' If you see other sites that say the same thing, have a quick look. I did this for my own company site today, and lo and behold: Some pimply-faced Eastern European teenager decided to copy my site between porn viewing sessions. Here's their…

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33 Internet Marketing Terms You Should Know

SEO. PPC. Social Media. Pagerank. Link authority. What the hell? If you're not an internet marketer, here's a list of terms so that you can translate what someone like me spouts at you in a caffeine-induced rush. This isn't a comprehensive internet marketing glossary. Just the terms we'd probably use without thinking about it. Print this list and hang it next to your phone: A-list bloggers. aka A-listers or Those Miserable Buggers (when I'm feeling jealous). All those writers who dominate the Technorati rankings (see Technorati, below). Getting a nod from one of these folks can mean exponential growth in…

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Internet Marketing Zodiac: Building the Perfect Team

Yup, I'm back! Had a great vacation, and as always spent time wondering if my office would still be there when I returned. Of course it was. I have a great team. You can build a great internet marketing team, too. Not by saying "I need a developer" and "I need an SEO expert". That'll get you something resembling an Edsel, only less functional. Instead, make sure you have a few folks that fit these basic internet marketing zodiac signs: The Muskrat The Muskrat is the ultimate generalist. This person understands both the technical and the marketing side of internet…

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3-Hour Internet Marketing Tune-Up

You can improve your web site as a business asset if you've got 3 hours a month for some basic internet marketing. "But Iaaannnnnnnnnn I just don't have any tiiimmmmmeeeee...." It's true. You're busy. You've got stuff to do like answering e-mails, answering phone calls, checking out that YouTube video someone just sent you or otherwise giving in to the information tsunami. Or, you can unplug your phone. Close your e-mail software. Put a little egg timer on your desk. And do this 3-hour internet marketing tune-up. If it doesn't improve your results, I'll quit eating Kit Kats for a…

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How NOT to Design a Signup Form: Toyota

Toyota has a social network for people nuts about their cars. Since I've already built my own Prius web site I figured I'd sign up. Here's the form they threw at me: I don't think so! If you want folks to sign up for a social network, where they will do the work, they will create the content and they will support the community, ask for their e-mail address and a password. Get the rest of the information later. Otherwise it feels like you're going through passport control...…

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8 Old Internet Marketing Tools That Still Work

I went and saw Indiana Jones and the Kingdom of the Crystal Skull last night. It was bad. Awful. Root-for-the-army-ants-because-they-might-end-the-movie-sooner awful. Seeing a great old franchise turned to so much stinking manure me to thinking about some old things that do still work for us internet marketers: Blogging Carnivals. I always seem to forget about this, but if you want to build links and network with like-minded folks, blog carnivals are fantastic. Try BlogCarnival.com if you want to see what it's like. Very little involved in getting started, and the payoffs are enormous. Pay per click marketing. Yes, it's more…

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If Your Competitor Jumped Off the Brooklyn Bridge, Would You?

In internet marketing, following the crowd, even if they’re successful, can get you in trouble. A Little Introduction [Skip to the next section if you don't like to read background stuff.] How many people here grew up on the East coast? (Ian raises hand) How many people heard this quote from their mother, father or grandparent? If your friends [insert stupid act here] would you, too? (Ian raises hand) Mine typically involved the Brooklyn Bridge or Empire State Building. They’re big, gravity is a harsh mistress, and generally my parents though it’d make me stop and think. Cough. In the…

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How To: Create a Great 404 Page Not Found Error Page

I hate seeing these: It’s a waste. You put all that work into creating a great site. Someone makes a mistake like mis-typing a page name, or they click a bad link on someone else's site, and you drive them away with the internet equivalent of a wagging finger. By the way, this is a competitor’s site: A marketing agency that claims to offer internet marketing. Why am I not a multi-millionaire? You can have a much friendlier ‘page not found’ page - also known as a 404 error page: It’s easy: If you can create a plain, static HTML…

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How Internet Marketing Keeps the Ball Rolling

Internet marketing is better at keeping the ball rolling, business-wise, than any other medium. I swear, this diagram will make perfect sense by the time you’re done reading: Step 1: All Marketing Starts With Discovery You start marketing your product or service when someone discovers it and assigns a value to it. I’m not talking about dollar value. I mean the kind of value that says “This won't end up in the attic a week from now”. Online, discovery happens through search engine results (paid and organic), social media, e-mail marketing, referral and other methods. It works if you know…

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Internet Marketing Basics: The Players

It's Friday. I'm burnt out on Web x.0, Moo! and all the other drama du jour. So I'm heading back to internet marketing basics. If you're a beginner at all this, or need a refresher, read on. What are the big vehicles in internet marketing these days? Where can you get traffic? What should you ignore? Here's my list: Unpaid (Organic) Search Engine Results Depending on who you ask, search engines generate anywhere from 60-75% of all traffic online. I'm willing to bet lunch that it's closer to 85%. Stop 10 random people on the street. Ask them how they…

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